Break Your Inner Child Free From Its Prison

It’s difficult to be told we are doing something that is unhealthy, especially when it’s something we already know we are doing and are already beating ourselves up about. We get so wrapped up in our reasons why we have allowed our actions (or lack thereof) to continue in a way that is unhealthy for us, in a pattern that is not bringing us what we actually want, that our defenses immediately blockade all outside forces from reinforcing our uncomfortable awareness.

When we are confronted with these small or large internal blocks, it can be best to simply step back, not respond, go home and think about it without discounting it and forgetting about it. Try not to be angry at the person who said it. Use it instead. The best we could do is to just keep looking at it and asking ourselves why we do or do not take that action. When we get to an answer, ask ourselves again, why? And just keep allowing our curious Inner Child to “why?” us until we get to the bottom of it. (Let our new Inner Child Collection remind you! https://axyourtrauma.com/#inner-child-collection

From there, it will take pure willpower to overcome. But when we know where the original issue is coming from, this is where we can actually change it. It’s not going to happen just because we are now armed with this information. We will still need pure will power to take the actions we truly want to take. Will power is the tough part. Because, obviously there’s a block on this one thing that takes us over. Maybe it’s a simple as not doing the dishes, or maybe it’s larger and more social. Maybe it’s about our worth and what we deserve…mentally, emotionally, financially and spiritually. These are common blocks. Are we going to overcome them by getting angry at the people who say them? The people who point out the obvious to us? I know it sucks. The last thing that anyone wants to hear is their sore point that they already know they have. It’s the last thing! But it’s the one thing that will help us to get there. If it’s coming from a stranger, that could be better! At least we aren‘t emotionally attached to them. If it’s a family member, a friend or a spouse (which it often is), this is when we need to step back long enough to inspect ourselves and what is real for us internally and then go to them for help in whatever way we know they might be able to (of course, this assumes that they are not mentally or emotionally abusive people. If they are, save this step for those who are not abusive). This could be asking them to help us stay accountable or this could be physical help. Whatever it is, asking for help is a magnificent step forward into the world of a Truly Healed Self. Without others, it is as though we are holding onto a floating branch in the middle of the ocean, expecting that at any moment that mysterious extended hand will come along and we will jump up on a safe and happy ship. The safe and happy ship is right here with those we know. We just have to keep up the conversation and ask for help when we need it.

-Janice M. Burke

P.S.- For those of us who are isolated and do not have anyone in their lives, now is a good time to join as many groups and attend as many events and meet ups that you can. There might be many groups that do not fit, but if you continue, you will find the right fit and suddenly, you will have wonderful people in your life.

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