Spikey, Bound Up Ball

Ever meet that person that has been through sheer torture and wind up very tightly into themselves? They were so shamed and silenced that they could do nothing else. As they got older, they developed concentrated spikes and daggers that they would use in their words and actions toward loved ones. This is what they were shown, this is how they were brought up, with those little spikes and daggers. They learned well, however, they will likely never see it. When we get too bound up inside ourselves, and use those spikes and daggers on a regular basis, it’s even harder than everyone else, to see ourselves clearly. How can a tightly bound ball see it’s core? Other people certainly don’t want to tell the person with the spikes and daggers what they see in them. It’s difficult for anyone to see their core, but with this combination specifically, it’s even more difficult. It’s important to learn how to recognize who these people are. When they get their little digs in at any opportune moment that they can find, then just say “oh you don’t understand” or “you’re overreacting”, “you can’t take a joke”, “you’re too sensitive”, etc., this is the time that we need to sit up and take notice. If we don’t learn how to recognize this, we will be sucked into their black hole and consumed by it. There is abuse that, through spiked and daggered words, can cause a pain so deep that it is never quite gone from us. When we learn how to recognize individuals like this and how to develop enough self-love and self-respect to maintain healthy boundaries, then we can finally begin to bask in the glow of all the healing we have been doing. We can finally begin to develop true self-confidence and peace. We can finally begin to live life on our own terms.

~Janice M. Burke

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