The Attention Seeker

Expressing herself wildly, arms gesturing as loud, hurried words stream from her mouth. She is storytelling. Her life wide open for anyone who will hear…and loud enough so that everyone does. She is talking over the disinterested, narcissistic family lodged in her head from childhood, stuck, like a thorn, in her soul. Those who talked before she was finished talking, louder than she did, as though her words were boring and something to suffer through. She is loud now, and speaks quickly and aggressively to be sure she can get her point across, though her family is nowhere to be found, some dead, others scattered and non communicative. When someone hears her now and compliments what she has to say, she is suspicious. What could they want? She guesses they want a compliment in return, and refuses to give it. She wouldn’t give someone so manipulative the time of day she tells herself. Though in fact, this is not what they want. They want nothing but to give her a compliment that is true and deeply felt. She puts her walls up, strong and thick. Her family, now disembodied thoughts, memories and patterns, smile sardonically. She tells another story, again so wildly. She drinks more coffee and depressively tells herself that she has once again been rejected and is once again so alone, while the people who care about her sigh with resignation.